"Shut up! You had me at hello."

There is a wonderful scene in the movie Jerry Maguire where Jerry, played by Tom Cruise, is standing before his estranged wife, played by Renee Zellweger and he is rambling on about his undying love for her and the fact that she 'completes him.' She stands there in total silence listening to him and then not able to take it any more she blurts out, 'Shut up, just shut up! You had me at hello.' Call me soft, but I love that moment and the comment, 'Shut up! You had me at hello.' For me it was the defining moment of the movie and Cruise's character for that matter because it was at that moment that he actually really connected with her for the first time. The rest was superfluous. And so it is when we connect with others. There is a defining moment when the other party can say 'Shut up! You had me at hello,' and the rest will be superfluous.

'Connecting' as defined by The Concise Oxford Dictionary is 'uniting with others in relationship' and must not be confused with the notion of 'touching' which is simply the means of 'coming into contact' with a person and does not imply the formation of a deep relationship. In alignment surveys that we have undertaken with our clients, we have found that one of the biggest barriers to strategy execution and individual performance is a lack of connection that people have with the strategy they are meant to execute as well as the lack of connection they have with their managers. In such instances the employees become disengaged and just go through the motions although their hearts and minds are elsewhere. As a result, strategy execution suffers.

The power of 'connecting' with people became evident to me when a company I was managing a while ago divested of one of its core businesses which as you would expect, created a lot of uncertainty and angst amongst the employees who were afraid of losing their jobs. (As a side bar: The uncertainty was fueled further by the fact that we had heard of the divestiture via the internet and not through company channels.) However despite their underlying fear, we were able to have on of our best years ever. The reason: we were connected with our employees. Their pain was our pain and they knew it.

Managers have opportunities to 'connect' with their employees and customers daily. However, there is one time when the need to connect is of paramount importance and that is on the first day of an individual's employ. Most people that I have spoken to remember the first day that they walked into their company. They remember how they were treated by the receptionist, the HR manager, their manager's PA and their boss. They also remember the actions of their peers throughout the day and whether they were made to feel welcome or unwelcome;  whether they were made to feel included or excluded. Managers that I have spoken to admit however, that they do not spend enough time on that first day trying to connect with their new employee. 

In a nutshell, if your employees or customers aren't able to say, "Shut up! You had me at hello,"  then you are probably not connected.

ian  

Comments

[Nike Air Max 2009]

Inspiring post. I believe anything and everything that comes to us - good or bad - are gifts that we deserve. We may not think of it as a gift at the exact moment it comes to
us. But sooner or later, it shows itself as the blessing it really is.

[Ian Campbell]

You're welcome.Always good to know that people are reading what is posted.
ian